Category Archives: Motivation
Stop, Look and Listen… The Follow Up!
I am still smiling from ear to ear after the great response I received last Thursday from the “Stop, Look and Listen” post! Thanks to everyone who took the time to read it, and a special shout out to those who took the time to comment. In case you missed it, here it is again:
I have been “practicing what I have been preaching” on a couple of items and wanted to give you an update:
I recently reached out to an old colleague that I have not spoken to in many years. Our relationship was a little choppy to say the least for a long time and we happily stayed “out of touch” as our careers continued with different organizations. They were happy to re-connect via social media, and vowed to stay in touch going forward.
I also had a face-to-face meeting with an old friend when he visited my city recently. We had not really hung out for the better part of ten years, and it was awesome to see each other again! We were the best of friends in university and stirred up the occasional bit of trouble, so it was nice to sit down and chat. We picked up right where we had left off which is what I expected to happen!
For the above situations, so much time had passed, I was not even sure why we “broke up” in the first place. It is all water under the bridge now. Time to move on.
A third story has been on my mind a lot since last Thursday. I became quite close with a customer of mine many years ago early in my career. We had a lot in common, and loved to talk about hockey every time I visited his store. If memory serves me correctly, we stayed in touch for a bit after I started a new role, but we finally drifted apart and never communicated again.
As my mind drifted during work last week, I finally decided that it was time to take action and reach out to him again after all these years. Within an hour of making that commitment to contact him, I received a very disturbing email. He had passed away suddenly the night before. I was in absolute shock.
– Is it time to reach out to somebody from your past?
– Is it time to leave the “past in the past” and move forward?
– Is the time to do that TODAY?
Things can change in an instant – unfortunately my third story proves that.
Hope I can motivate all of you to take action!
Have You Stopped, Looked And Listened Lately?
Just before Christmas we found out that our wonderful dog Chase had terminal cancer and only had a few weeks to live. Although we were quite upset, he had come through major health issues the previous year so we were not surprised. My wife and I agreed to keep him as long as he was doing fine, and as soon as he showed signs of a drop off, we would put him down.
I tried to play the “he’s just a dog card”, but that did not work. It was a very difficult time when he took a turn for the worst. We scheduled an appointment at the vet the next day. The following afternoon, my whole family was out, so I had a chance to sit with him on our deck.
It was an abnormally mild January day for Northern Alberta, which allowed him one last chance to hang out in the yard that he loved so much. He was not able to chase the squirrels like had had done hundreds of times before, but he was able to lie there as I stayed close.
As I sat with him and shut off the world around me, I stopped everything that I was doing, looked around at the place that he had called home for so many years, and just listened to all the sounds around us. I had not been in that relaxed a state for what seemed like months, and was able to fully disengage from the hustle and bustle of life to be in the moment with him. I became so relaxed that I actually fell asleep with him on the deck for one of the last hours of his life!
I reflected upon this event a few weeks after he had passed, and thought fondly about our time together in the yard taking it all in. We get so wrapped up getting through the day that we don’t take enough time to stop, look and listen. I can’t remember the last time I just sat with Chase in the back yard and hung out. There were always other things happening that seemed more important than just being with him.
Perhaps you may want to:
– Cut back on your workload to spend more time with family, friends and even pets
– Reduce your outside commitments so you can have some “me time”
– Take up a hobby again that you have been unable to keep up with because life got in the way
– Connect with people that you have not corresponded with in a long time
and…
Stop, look and listen to everything around you. Take a breath and be thankful for everyone that you hold dear, and focus more on them. You never know how long they will be around for!
The Five Star 5 – Lessons I’ve Learned From My Sons
I was looking through old “Five Star 5” posts last night, and this one caught my attention. As many of you know, I now have two sons, and this message is more powerful as I watch both of them grow and develop each day!
I was looking for an old picture on my computer recently, and ended up spending an hour watching old videos of my son. Wow time flies by! It seems like only yesterday he uttered his first word, took his first step, and spent his first day at pre-school! Now my soon to be six-year-old is off to grade 1 in a little over a month.
Sometimes we get so focused on raising them and just getting through the day, we forget how much they are developing at this young age and shaping who they will become in the future. There are lessons that we can all learn from kids, when we take the time to really watch what they are doing.
Here are five lessons that I have learned along the way from my best bud!
- Smile and laugh when possible
- Always be asking questions and trying new things
- Don’t get frustrated when things don’t go your way
- Try to do a good job at whatever you are doing, but don’t worry about being perfect
- Be silly sometimes, it is ok!
And a bonus lesson…..
- Be a good friend
Communication Breakdown – My Stuttering Journey
I Once knew a boy…
- Who was horrified to get called on to speak out loud in grade school class
- Stood behind his mom or dad’s leg every time as a child when people tried to speak to him in public
- Answered the telephone by saying “Yeah” at home and not “Hello” when he had trouble saying the word
- Would cry himself to sleep on occasion as a child wondering why he was different and did not speak like everyone else
- Once had a teacher stop him from speaking out loud in class, came up to him, asked him to open his mouth and checked if “there was an answer” to his speech issues in there
- Would sit for what seemed like hours afraid to pick up the phone before calling a friend when he was afraid to stutter
- As a teenager, would never go through the drive-thru to order food because he was afraid to mess up his words
- As a young adult, would only order drinks at a nightclub only if he could say the word properly, even if he did not even really like the drink
- Would get lazy and only say words that he could say smoothly throughout the first 18 years of his life, and not work on the difficult words
- As a high school graduate focused on getting in to a profession where he would not have to interact with many people, and could keep to themselves
That boy was me, and growing up I felt like I was the only person in the world that was dealing with a stuttering issue. We have all dealt with stuff in our lives, and fought through adversity in our own ways. I look forward to sharing my entire speech journey at some point in the future but for today, you only need understand this.
I have not allowed these issues to take control of my life. I changed my area of study in school because I hated the courses that I was hiding behind when I felt scared to face the world. I have always been in a very relationship oriented professions, and speak in front of groups of people regularly. I have cold called face to face, in person, and been in pressure packed speaking situations more than I care to remember.
But you know what, I made it through every situation, some more easily than others. Today I am involved with Toastmasters, doing video on my blog, and am not afraid to tell my story to the world.
We are not here to judge each other on what is, or is not significant in terms of what is causing issues in our lives. But we need to be there to support each other and aid in getting past these hurdles.
I am convinced that if I did not have those speech issues growing up that I would not have become as touch a customer as I am today. Perspective is a powerful thing, and when I attended an info session recently to volunteer at a stuttering clinic, I realized that I did not have it so bad after all! It just seemed like it at the time, because all eyes were on me as I struggled day-to-day.
- What is holding you back?
- Is there something that others can help you get through to become who you really want to be professionally and/or personally?
It may seem like a big deal now, but once you conquer it you can look back and say,
“That was a turning point in my life!”
If you have a story that you would be comfortable sharing, I would love to post them on my blog in the next couple of weeks. Please send them to:
TimMushey@gmail.com
What Are You Prepared To Give Up – Right Now?
My name is Tim Mushey, and I am a “hockey-a-holic”. The labour strife in the National Hockey League ended a couple of weeks ago, and hockey is finally back!
I am super excited that the coolest game in the world is back, but I had to make a decision. I quit all of my hockey pools, cold turkey! For the first time in many years, I am not in one hockey pool, NOT ONE! To be clear, this was never about the money. It was about fun with friends, and the competitive spirit to try to out do each other.
Although I miss it a lot, it had to be done. I have gone from checking the scores around 25 times a night (not joking) to maybe twice. I don’t have to watch all the highlights before bed, just when I have time.
That extra time I have every day can now be spent working towards my goals. Perhaps it is writing my blog, connecting and following up with social media activities, or learning and planning my next steps online.
If feels good that my time is being put to better use now, and I can also focus more on my family.
- What do you have to quit “cold turkey”?
- What is going to help you move closer to achieving your goals that you have not been focusing on?
Remember, a little bit every day is still a great place to start!
I miss hockey pools, but it won’t help me retire early 🙂
My Video – We All “Default” To The Couch
I have wanted to do some new videos over the past couple of months, but just have not made the time. I will finally be “taking action” over the next few weeks and develop some new ones. I can’t wait!
In the interim, I wanted to share a couple of my favourite videos today and tomorrow. I hope you enjoy them!
Couches are a comfortable place to hang out. Most of us spend too much time relaxing on them. Check out my latest video to see why less couch time leads to a more fulfilling life!
More Words of Wisdom From Rocker Jon Bon Jovi
For those of you who are paying attention to “All Things Tim Mushey”, you will know that I am a huge Bon Jovi fan – Jon Bon Jovi in particular. I have alluded to the band and other quotes of his before on this blog.
I stumbled across a new Jon Bon Jovi quote on Google+ today thanks to Paul Castain.
I am not going to lie, I was halfway through a new blog post tonight, but started connecting with people like crazy, and corresponding online. I lost track of time and rather than getting to bed early, I decided to do a little quotes post anyways. Funny how I have a bit more time on the road in a hotel room, than at home with a 6-year-old and 5 week old!
In all seriousness, thanks to Paul for coming up with this gem. Hope you like it as much as I did.
“Each one of you has something no one else has, or has ever had: your fingerprints, your brain, your heart. Be an individual. Be unique. Stand out. Make noise. Make someone notice. That’s the power of individuals.” – Jon Bon Jovi
O.J. Brigance – Ex NFL Football Player, An Inspiration To Us All!
I watched this video recently and heard it again on the radio over the weekend. I was deeply touched by the effect of O.J. Brigance’s presence on the Baltimore Raven’s NFL football team.
But this is not only a football story, but an incredible life story as well!
Hope you enjoy this as much as I did.
Have a great week.
Tim
Your “Indefinite Unsettledness” Will End – Mine Did!
Do you ever not feel quite right? Things just aren’t as they should be? Maybe it only lasts a day, perhaps a week, month or possibly even years. I had these feeling about my career for a little less than 3 years.
It was October of 2009 that I lost my job, and it sucked. It sucked big time, but I shook it off and was back to work two months later. But that job did not work out, nor did the second, or the third! I had worked for one company for almost eight years before that, and had never categorized myself as a quitter, but I became quite self-conscious with all the changes. But I kept fighting, and believing in myself that I could do whatever I wanted with my career and life.
I stayed in touch over the past three years with a manager at an account during that time period before I was fired. I would stop by, catch up, try to sell him products and services that I was representing at the time. He was never far from my thoughts. We had discussed me coming to work with his company on several occasions, but the timing was never right.
Well that time has finally come and I start my new role on November 1st with that organization. A huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders, and I can look forward to work again every day from the moment my feet hit the floor each morning. When you change jobs every year for three years, you start to feel a little lost and temporarily forget what made you successful in the past.
Whatever “indefinite unsettledness” you may be feeling, it will go away, I promise you that. But only if you work at it. I had some horrible days; weeks for that matter over the past three years, but I never gave up. In fact, the best thing that came out of these past three years was picking up a note pad and pen, and starting to write. Now I have this blog, I am in Toastmasters, and I look forward to writing a book, possibly training, teaching and speaking to others somewhere down the line.
As abrasive as it sounds, you need to have that moment where you say something like “screw it, I know I can do this“. And keep fighting for what you really want.
Good luck and remember, if I can get past my “indefinite unsettledness”, so can you!
Sell, Lead, Succeed! 